I'm starting a new feature today, thanks to the simplicity and expanse that is called AllTop.com.

Please read the following futuristic piece about a dad thinking how he's going to talk to his twin kids in the future.  Since my twins now are 9 and the other kids in the house are 16, 15, 11, 11, and 4, Lord knows how many times we'll have to repeat this conversation below.  This is a fun piece.  How many of you know what all of these words even mean?  There are a few here I've got to learn:

How I see conversations with my kids transpiring in the next 10-15 years.*

Me: Swee’Pea, where are you going tonight?
Swee’Pea: I’m going to see that band ByteMe that I found on MySpace.
Me: Who are you going with?
Swee’Pea: I’m going with the “We Love ByteMe” social group from Facebook.
Me: Okay, but I want you to BrightKite your location to Twitter every hour so I know you’re safe.
Swee’Pea: *Sigh* Okay.
Me: And no blaming the Fail Whale, you understand me?  If you can’t Twitter me then you’d better Plurk me, okay?
Swee’Pea: But Dad! Plurking is so not cool.
Me: I don’t care. If I’m not satisfied where you are, young lady, I’ll have you post a camera phone pic to Flickr to prove where you are.
Swee’Pea: Jeez, Dad. You’re a pain sometimes.
Me: Well, I’m sorry but you have to be safe. And be
careful who you hang out with. I don’t want to see any inappropriate
videos surface on YouTube.
Swee’Pea: Fine. Anything else?
Me: Yeah. If all else fails, you can text me, call my cell or the land line.
Swee’Pea: [On her way out the door] Okay. Okay. Fine. I’m starting to wonder if you giving me my own cell phone was a good idea or not.
Me: [To myself, under my breath] Yeah, and maybe someday I’ll tell you about that GPS chip in your phone.

*Of course, there will be tools and online communities that we
haven’t even dreamed of yet. And I will be considered a dinosaur no
matter how long I’ve been blogging.

Footnote: Also, this post is
tongue-in-cheek. I believe good-old-fashioned parenting vs. relying on
technology is definitely the better way. But with the proliferation of
technology, it is interesting to note all the extra tools we have at
our disposal.

And eventually technology seeps into our lives whether we
like it or not. I imagine that before the telephone became widespread
parents couldn’t even have their kids “call when they get there.” Many
of the ways of keeping track of your child might even seem
second-nature in 10 years. We’ll certainly see.

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