Ugh.  I just saw someone visited and that was the search term that brought them here.

The question: Does Santa Claus Go To Divorced Homes?

I’m now going through my second divorce.  It really, really sucks.  I never in 45 years of life would have thought that I’d be going through a second one.  I searched so long for the two women I loved enough to marry, it’s doubly worse when they don’t seem to work out.

With my first wife, with whom all three of my daughters were born, Christmas traditionally has been something we’ve divvied up on gifts.  In other words, we’ve let the other know what we think Santa might be bringing and worked from there.  We’ve also never gone by the terms of the decree and made the other wait until the following day to get the kids.  We’ve always let the kids go to the other’s house mid-day or so, so they could find the other half of Santa’s plunder.  

So children suffering from divorce, I’d say yes, Santa does go to divorced homes. But you need to keep in mind, the kinds of gifts Santa might bring are a little different.

More on that in a bit.

Second Marriage

I love all seven of the kids equally and always will whether I’m allowed to see them, or they ask to remain a part of my life or not.  My two younger sons and I, I really felt had a good relationship.  My daughter, whom you’ve read so much about here and on Twitter, knows no Dad but me.  My eldest son and I saw eye-to-eye on almost nothing, but I still love him, will always love him, and as the Mesquite ISD has done stupid things to him this year, I’ve been right there letting the principal at West Mesquite High School know he’s being a dumb-ass when he’s being a dumb-ass.

Christmas 2011

So this year’s Christmas is going to be different.  In many ways this year, I’m like The Little Drummer Boy.  Heck, I don’t even have a drum…

Gifts this year are going to be different than in years past.  They’re going to be tangible, meaningful and almost none of them are going to come from a store or have a dollar value assigned to them.  There will be letters of expression of my pride in each of them.  There will be some other surprises, too, (It’s still 10 days before Christmas so I can’t give it all away!)

Does Santa Claus Go To Divorced Homes?

Whom ever was doing that search, young or old, my answer to you is the same.  He does.  He may not leave behind the fanciest of gifts like a Robosan 4000, but he will leave behind a treasure chest of memories and inspiration.

God bless each of you children in step-family relationships, whose parents are separated or whose parents are newly divorced.  Life is hard sometimes and marriages, sadly, don’t always work out for one reason or another.  Always remember it’s not your fault that mom and dad didn’t make it. And always remember that when you get older, meet someone and fall in love, don’t forget what it felt like on those Christmas’ and holidays like these, so that you’ll be extra careful about with whom you get married.

  1. Cindy

    Good one

  2. Jennifer Nail

    Nice article.

  3. Kate

    I think you answered the question very well. It is a sad question. It sounds like a question a child would ask. I know you probably have good ideas for meaningful inexpensive gifts for the girls, but sometimes homemade coupon books are good. One free you pick the movie night. One free get out of chores free card. One free any dessert you want. One free after Christmas sale you pick a new ornament. One free pancakes for supper. One free you pick the game night, and things like that. Hope you have gotten the Christmas spirit back. I know this is your favorite time of the year! Hope your Dad gets to visit. Remember Taylor always called him the General. I always thought that was cute. Keep up the good fight. Merry Christmas Santa!

  4. ciara

    i’m getting ready to take my girls to vegas, where their dad lives, tomorrow. christmases were always rough, but somehow it always turns out okay. this was a great post. thx for sharing.

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